


Parasite from the Dark

by AlwaysAmused



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Bylesit is a little shit, DISCONTINUED!, Gen, I should go work on that series I've got going, I'm Bad At Tagging, Intersex Loki, Jötunn Loki, Loki Feels, Loki is Not Amused, Loki is Not Insane, Loki-centric, Odin is maybe not a dick, Parasites, Post-Avengers (2012), Protective Thor, Thor hugs, Writing Because Why Not, Ze/Zim/Zir, also the other three things I've started, because that's what I write best apparently, gross stuff, intersex jotnar, throwing up, writer is trash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-27
Updated: 2015-03-03
Packaged: 2018-03-15 13:21:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3448691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlwaysAmused/pseuds/AlwaysAmused
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"The parasite causes increased negative emotions, and takes a role on the physical state. It sort of taps into a person's seidr, which is why it latched onto Loki. I'm assuming it's been there for about a year or so, which isn't unheard of, but it's not healthy. I'm going to take it out, but I need you to hold him down. After the parasite is removed, he needs to come to Jotunheim. Our healers can monitor his recovery."</p><p>Loki's older sibling comes from Jotunheim to expel a parasite from his body. DISCONTINUED! There are NO PLANS to update this!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Marvel. Obviously.

Thor tugged on the chain, making Loki stumble a bit. Loki glared at him in retaliation, and Thor just smirked, continuing to tug him along. It was satisfying, yet he found it hadn't made him happy.

The Avengers were there as well, surrounding the area, should Loki escape and try to take over the world again. Thor turned and held out the other end of the transportation device to Loki. But before he could grasp it, there was a noise, much like two wooden poles smacking into each other, and a moment later, a thin, vertical line of yellow appeared. It spread outwards and became an oval, and a Jotun stepped through. Loki made a noise through the gag on him and Thor nearly dropped the Tesseract.

The giant's scarlet eyes landed on Loki and narrowed. Ze walked forwards and Loki stepped back. Thor let go of the chain, and grabbed Mjolnir from his belt. "Stay back!" He snarled.

The Jotun ignored him. Instead, ze looked at Loki and said "Greetings."

Loki's eyes widened and he glanced at Thor before looking back at the creature.

"I am Byleist," the Jotun continued. "The prince and adviser of Jotunheim. We-" Ze stopped there and frowned at Loki. "I get the feeling your eyes were green when I saw you last."

"They  _are_  green," Thor snarled. "Don't you touch him."

"They are  _blue_ ," Byleist pointed out. Ze frowned again and waved a hand at Thor, freezing him into a block of ice. Byleister walked towards Loki, who stumbled backwards. The Avengers moved into action, Clint shooting an arrow at them, Natasha shooting, and Steve throwing his shield. All of them hit an invisible barrier.

Byleist picked up the chain connected to Loki, and said "Stop  _moving_ , I'm not going to do anything to you yet."

Ze pulled Loki towards zim and grabbed his arm. Loki struggled, trying to get away, but Byleist's grip was firm. The frost giant turned and waved a hand at Thor, making the ice melt to his neck.

"Loki!" Thor shouted, and Byleist turned back to Loki. He was blue now, his eyes red. However, there was an odd ring of color, like an iris, around the pupil. Almost a purple color, but darker.

"As I suspected," Byleist murmured. Ze sighed and pulled a bottle out of nowhere. "Lay down, please."

When Loki showed no sign of complying, Byleist rolled zir eyes and placed the bottle between zir teeth, placing the other hand on Loki's head. Loki immediately went limp, and Byleister maneuvered him on the ground. Ze then straightened and walked over to where Thor was still frozen.

"Quiet and listen; Loki's life may depend on it," ze snapped. "Loki is currently infected with a parasite. It's quite common on Jotunheim, it likes dark, freezing places. It's easy to get rid of once you know it's there, but it's rare that the person who's hosting the parasite knows it's there. Usually we can tell because Jotnar eyes are usually all red, but with the virus, the iris turns a dark color.

"The parasite causes increased negative emotions, and takes a role on the physical state. It sort of taps into a person's seidr, which is why it latched onto Loki. I'm assuming it's been there for about a year or so, which isn't unheard of, but it's not healthy. I'm going to take it out, but I need you to hold him down. After the parasite is removed, he needs to come to Jotunheim. Our healers can monitor his recovery."

"A parasite?" Thor frowned.

"Yes," Byleist replied, nodding. "We call them ordeks."

"And how can I believe this?" Thor said, glaring. "I've never heard of this before."

Byleist snorted, crossing zir arms. "Of course not," ze said. "They occupy cold dark places, like Nidavellir, Svartalfheim, and Jotunheim. And probably Niflheim and Ginnungagap as well."

"The Void?" Thor said, going quiet.

"Yes," Byleist said. "Are you going to help, or are you not?"

Thor swallowed. "I will help."

Byleist waved a hand and the ice melted. Ze turned and walked back to where Loki lay, and knelt, picking up the bottle and opening it, shaking it until a brown ball of something fell into zir hand. Thor knelt on the other side and said "What must I do?"

"First, take that damn muzzle off," Byleist said. "Then make sure he can't stand up, and can't use his hands."

Thor put Mjolnir on Loki's chest, then took his hands and moved to kneel by his head. "Are you sure about this?" He asked, removing the muzzle.

Byleist scoffed. "I have done this procedure many times before, even those as young and small as Loki. As I have said, this is a common parasite."

Thor nodded and Byleist said "Before I start, Loki will get into a violent state. He may scream, cry, struggle. You must do  _nothing_  unless I say. You understand? Swear to it."

Thor swallowed and nodded again. "You've my word."

"Then let us begin." Byleist opened Loki's mouth and crumbled the brown ball into it. Loki's eyes snapped open and tried to move his head away. Byleist held his jaw open and still, continuing as Loki began to struggle, making noises.

As soon as the ball was in, Byleist closed his mouth and covered it with zir hand. Loki made a sort of whining noise and squeezed his eyes shut, trying to struggle away.

"Swallow it," Byleist said. Loki made a noise of protest, and ze sighed, pinching Loki's nose shut. Loki struggled harder and Thor bit his cheek to stay quiet. It remained that way for a moment, Byleist covering Loki'a mouth and nose with one hand, and stroking his throat with the other.

After what seemed to be an eternity to Thor, Loki swallowed. Byleist released his nose, but continued to keep his mouth shut, stroking his throat. Loki made choking noises and Thor said "Stop, stop! He's-"

"A trickster," Byleist replied. "He is not choking, just faking so I'll stop." To Loki, ze said "It won't work. Just swallow it."

Loki swallowed again. A moment later, he began to thrash more, screaming under Byleist's hand, his eyes squeezed shut. He thrashed his legs and when his eyes opened, they were blue, completely blue, pupil small as a pinprick.

"Here we go," Byleist murmured, and a blackish goo started to leak from his eyes and nose. Byleist took zir hand off Loki's mouth and he squeezed his eyes shut, panting. Only seconds later, Loki screamed again, and a black smoke came from his mouth, evaporating into the air.

Loki fell limp, and Byleist said "You can take the hammer off his chest now."

Thor released Loki's hands and did so. Byleist turned Loki onto his side and began to murmured a spell, rubbing circles into his back in a soothing sort of way. Loki coughed, then gagged, then sat up and vomited on the pavement, a small black  _thing_  wriggling on the ground.

"And there it is," Byleist murmured, and took out a small, empty bottle from somewhere. Ze pushed the small creature into it, and corked the bottle. Ze handed it to Thor and said "Take a look."

Thor had Loki cradled in his arms, unconscious, black goo still dripping from his mouth. Byleiste sighed and took Loki from him and put him back on the ground, on his side. "There may be more coming up," ze told Thor. "Better to keep his airway clear."

Thor nodded and accepted the little bottle, peering inside. It was a beetle-like creature, two bright blue eyes set on its head, it was scuttling around the bottle in a panic. It looked about the size of a walnut.

"It is so... big," he said, surprised.

"For one of those, it's small," Byleiste replied. "The ones that come out of ygmis are usually much smaller than that because we catch them quicker. But I've seen them twice that size coming out of a regular sized Jotun." Thor gave him the bottle back, and it vanished somewhere.

"Why not kill it?" Thor asked.

"In case of complications, the healers need it. Once Loki has recovered, we will destroy it," Byleist said. "Come now, we must go to Jotunheim. Aesir healers will not know how to help him recover."

Thor nodded and stood. Loki gagged again and more black goo came up from his stomach. He opened his eyes briefly, and Thor saw the brilliant green in them. How had he missed that Loki's eyes had changed?

Byleist scooped Loki up, much like a child, and waved a hand, opening a portal. Thor turned to the Avengers and waved, smiling. "Farewell, my friends." He picked up the Tesseract and went through behind Byleist.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleist takes Thor and Loki to the infirmary on Jotunheim. We get to see a little of what happens to Loki immediately after he let go.
> 
> Warning for more gross stuff in the third part of the chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Marvel. Obviously.

"Where are we?" Thor asked, following Byleist through the halls. Jotnar kept turning to look at them, and shrank away from Thor. Thor had tied Mjolnir back to his belt, but he felt a bit vulnerable.

"The palace," Byleist replied. Ze turned back, grinning, and said "What, did you think Laufey ruled in that temple you saw?"

Thor frowned. "Why was he there, then?"

"We were alerted when you landed in the Realm. Ze knew what your purpose must be, so ze decided to confront you zimself," Byleist said. "It is rare that people come and go from Jotunheim, especially since the treaty between our Realms was put into effect."

Thor went quiet as they continued along. It was a relief when they finally came to the healing rooms, and Byleist called a healer over to them. Ze murmured something to the healer, taking out the bottle that contained the parasite. The healer took the bottle and led them over to a bed.

"Put zim here," ze said, and Byleist placed Loki in the bed. Thor watched, standing awkwardly until the healer had left.

"You may sit if you wish," Byleist said. "I must find my sosken and explain the situation."

"Your what?" Thor frowned.

"Jotnar are genderless," Byleist said, rolling zir eyes. "What you call a brother or sister, I call sosken. Helbindi is the king of Jotunheim, being the eldest. Loki is the youngest. None will harm you here, just stay out of the healer's way."

Thor nodded and Byleist left. He took a seat besides Loki's bed and took his brother's hand, stroking the back of it with his thumb. Loki was pale, and there were dark circles under his eyes.

A healer came over and glanced at Thor before getting to work, taking a pair of shears and cutting Loki's clothes off. Ze frowned and said to Thor "How long did ze have the parasite inside of zim?"

Thor looked up, blinking. "I do not know the exact amount of time," he replied. "I have not seen him for about a year."

The healer nodded and wrote it down before pressing a finger to Loki's pulse. Ze wrote that down as well and did a few other checks, but Thor stopped paying attention, instead focusing on Loki's injuries. There were fading bruises, and thick white scars that crossed over each other. The chains had been removed from his wrists, and Thor's eyes traveled up and down his brother's body, blinking in confusion. He had known that the doctor, Bruce Banner, had swung Loki around a bit. Yet it didn't seem enough to cause the healing gashes in his brother's side. He noticed also that Loki was starving; Thor could almost count his ribs.

"Those infected tend to forget about self care, so malnutrition and dehydration isn't uncommon," the healer said, noticing Thor's look. "However these wounds are odd. Do you know where they might have come from?"

Thor shook his head. "What does the parasite  _do_?" He asked

"They feed on seidr"” ze said, pulling a blanket over Loki. "But I can sense zir magic is already beginning to heal zim. The wounds look tended too, but I'll bandage them anyway."

Thor swallowed. "He will be okay?"

The healer smiled. "Yes," ze replied. “He should be fine. But he will be weak for some time. Overexposure can cause that, but his strength will return in time. The parasite also causes extreme irrationality and anger, so that should fade away as well."

Thor nodded. "What are they called again?"

"Ordeks," the healer replied. "Now, if you need anything, my name is Healer Abda."

Thor returned to holding Loki's hand. "When will he wake?"

"If ze doesn't wake in the next day, we will wake zim," Healer Abda replied.

"Thank you," Thor said, and the healer left. Thor reached out and pushed the hair out of Loki's face, stroking his cheek once.

* * *

"Prince Thor?

Thor's head snapped up from where he'd been dozing to see a frost giant approaching, Byleist following behind. Thor stood and said "Yes?"

"I am Helbindi, King of Jotunheim," ze replied. "It is good to meet you."

Thor nodded and said "And you as well."

Helbindi glanced down at Loki and said "Is it true that he killed Laufey?"

Thor blinked, then said "Why?"

Helbindi smiled, then shook his head. "You misunderstand," ze said. "We have no intention of hurting Loki. By all means, none in Jotunheim are displeased at Laufey's death, save the few supporters ze had. They have long since fled. Ze was insane, even we could see that. The facts have been blurred; few know the truth surrounding the death of Laufey. The people of Jotunheim only know that Laufey went to Asgard to retrieve the Casket, and Asgard attacked us."

Thor nodded, unsure as of where this was going. Helbindi looked back at Loki and said "The last time I gazed upon my sosken, zir name was Ven. Born on July seventh, at the end of the war, ze was the last child Farbauti-mor would bear." Ze tilted zir head. "I remember when ze was born."

"I don't," Byleist said bluntly.

"You were too young,” Helbindi replied. "Laufey drove zimself mad trying to find zim. Ze grew bitter when ze heard about Odin's second son."

"Loki's birthday is in December," Thor replied. "December sixteenth."

"Only a week after we lost Ven," Helbindi replied. Thor looked down.

"I... am sorry. For the loss, and for what my father did."

"It is not your fault, son of Odin," a new, deep voice said, and Thor turned to see another Jotun standing at the door. "He would have died had Odin not taken him. I am pleased he found a family to take care of him."

"Aye," Thor said, "but I now doubt that we took care of him at all."

"This is Thrym," Helbindi introduced. "The former commander of Jotunheim's military."

"And friend and adviser to the Laufey-King," Thrym added, grinning. "I advised zim not to be an idiot."

"Did it work?" Thor asked before he could stop himself. Thrym laughed wryly.

"No. It rarely did," ze replied, a slight smile on zir lips. Ze glanced at Loki and said "Is that zim?"

"Yes, Thrym," Helbindi said. "It's  _him_."

"Hmm." Thrym narrowed zir eyes. "He looks like Agnoda."

"Who?" Thor frowned.

"Thrym's child," Byleist said at the same moment Thrym said "My child."

"Ze's the captain of the guard," Helbindi explained at Thor's raised eyebrow. "Ze's also small, like Loki."

"I see," Thor said.

"Ze's also albino," Byleist added, smiling a little. "And very,  _very_  pretty."

Thrym crossed zir at zim and said "Don't make me tell zir you said that."

Byleist's eyes widened. "Don't you know it, I  _do_  think I've forgotten something. I'll see you later, sosken." Ze left in a hurry, glancing back at Thrym. Thrym smirked, and Helbindi just rolled zir eyes, turning back to Thor.

"I assume he hasn't woken yet?" Ze glanced at Loki.

"Not yet," Thor said, looking down again. Helbindi nodded.

"Then a word of caution." Thor looked up. "At times, people formerly infected get violent and confused. Loki may not have memories of his time infected, and they will may yet return to him. When he is strong enough to walk, we will send you both on your way home." Helbindi tilted his head to the side. "But know that you are both welcome whenever you wish."

"Thank you," Thor replied, and sat down again as the two Jotnar left.

* * *

Loki was falling. It was dark and it was cold and not for the first time since letting go,  _afraid_. It had been light when he had first let go, and it had been for a while, even if he couldn't appreciate it. But now it was dark, and he hadn't a clue as to when he would land, when he would die.

He regretted letting go. It was a stupid thing to do, really. After all, he hadn't done anything  _illegal_ , except let the Jotnar into Asgard on Thor's coronation. Everything else he had done while King, and so he couldn't be punished for it.

He was hungry and he was thirsty and he was so very  _tired_. He may have regretted letting go, but he just wished it would  _end_ , so he could be at  _peace_  and not be alone with his thoughts and the cold.

The ground came unexpectedly. It was still dark and cold, and he hit the ground like glass hitting a marble floor. He  _shattered_ , and a white agony spread through him, and he wanted to scream and scream and– maybe he  _was_  screaming, but there was blood roaring in his ears and-

And then, for a short, blissful while, there was  _nothing_.

When he woke, he ached. With a moan, he rolled over, and a voice said "Are you well?"

He sat up in alarm, gasping as a sharp pain shot through his body. He winced and felt someone move, a large hand at his back.

"You're alright," the voice soothed. "You're okay now. Can you tell me your name?"

"I-" Loki hissed and hands pushed him back down upon the ground. Or maybe it was a bed? It was warm...

"Your name," the voice said, "what is it?"

"Loki," he breathed, closing his eyes against the pain. "My name- Odin's son. I-" He whimpered. "Where am I?"

"Safe," the voice soothed, "you are safe, little one. Relax and take a deep breath." Loki did as the voice bade, tears beginning to leak from the corners of his eyes.

"I'm so tired," he whispered. "I just want to rest..."

"I know," the voice was sympathetic. "I know, little one. And you will. Just hold on a moment, okay? Then you can rest."

"It  _hurts_ ," he whimpered.

"Not for much longer," the voice said. "I promise. Everything will be fine. Trust me."

"Trust...?" Loki shuddered. "Who... Who are you?"

There was a soft laugh. It sounded fond.  _Amused_ , even. A soft cloth was pressed to Loki's eyes and he struggled for a moment.

"Open your mouth, please," the voice said.

"No," Loki whispered. "Please, I-"

"You want to rest, don't you?" The voice said.

"Yes," Loki breathed. "I just... yes."

"Then open your mouth," the voice said. "It'll be all over in a moment. No more pain."

"No more pain," Loki echoed. "No more pain..."

"Just open your mouth," the voice said, and Loki complied, letting his mouth hang.

A liquid went down Loki's throat, and he tried to lift his hand.

He couldn't. He couldn't move at all, and the cold cloth was removed from his eyes. He couldn't open them. His heart pounded wildly in his chest as fear sank in, and someone grabbed his mouth.

"Here we go, little one,"the voice said, and something that felt like a spider crawled in his mouth. Wanted to scream, to thrash, to rip it out.

Someone opened his eyes. They darted around, and he tried to get a sense of the person's face, but a light shone in his eyes and he couldn't see anything. "Just a few more moments, dear," the voice soothed. "And then it'll be over."

The light was taken away, and the impressions moved every time he tried to get a look at their face, just  _one look_...

It became cold. Or maybe it had been cold the whole time? He couldn't be certain anymore. Where was he?

 _I want to go home,_  he thought desperately.  _I want to go home. I just want this to stop. Please, let this stop, I just want to go home... I want... I want... I..._

**_No, Loki._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know how long this story is going to be, but users Jumiku and Arcadii both gave me a couple of ideas on where this was going. (I get ideas at the weirdest of times.)
> 
> Unlike other stories of mine, this will probably continue down a darker, grosser path. I've never really written anything like that, so I don't know how good it'll be, but I guess we'll find out. I may change ratings and add tags as we go along.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Author really likes writing reunions between Thor and Loki too much... *Sighs*
> 
> Hugs happen, also crying and stuff. For once, no gross shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Marvel. Obviously.

There was a noise from somewhere to his left, like someone was drumming their fingers on something. He could feel soft furs covering him, and the warmth they gave. It wasn't dark anymore. It was dim, and he heard the tell-tale crackling of a fire somewhere... in front of him? Well, he was laying down, so perhaps...?

Loki sighed, then winced at his chest twinged in pain. His throat felt like sand, so he swallowed. It didn't help.

The tapping stopped. Something to his left shifted, and a quiet voice whispered "Loki?"

"Mphmm..." Loki said intelligently, and sighed again. He wanted to roll over, but his... Well,  _everything_ felt like they were made of lead, so he only ended up shifting a little to the right.

Someone pulled the fur blanket up a little, and Loki gave a soft whine, too tired to actually do anything about it.

"Loki, are you awake?" The quiet voice asked.

Loki didn't bother to reply, realizing at that moment that he was comfortable. And hey, not falling, so that was...

Not falling.

_Wait._

He tried opening his eyes, feeling like they were glued together. He opened them a little, blinked, and they slipped shut again. Irritated, he tried again. And again. And again. Finally, he was able to keep them about half-way open, and shifted his head a little to the left. The owner of the voice was sitting next to the whatever it was Loki was laying on – a bed? – and had resumed drumming his fingers on the armrest of the chair. The chair was also shaking for some reason.

Loki tried swallowing again. His hair was tickling his chin, and he wanted to blow it away, but was unsure as of how to go about doing it. Instead, he sighed again, breathing out through his mouth. The man stopped his insufferable drumming, and looked over at him again. He had blue eyes and long blond hair, and a beard, and it was just then that Loki realized who it was.

"Loki?" Thor's eyes clouded with concern and he got up, kneeling by the side of the bed. "How do you feel?"

Loki blinked at him, then whispered "Water." His voice was scratchy and hoarse, and Thor looked confused for a moment before he nodded.

"I'll get some." He got up and walked off, and Loki closed his eyes again, not falling asleep. He was almost nodding off again when Thor returned with a pitcher and a cup. "Here," he murmured, and helped Loki to sit up a bit, leaning him against his chest. Loki hissed softly as his chest twinged again, and Thor murmured an apology. He then took the cup and brought it to Loki's lips, letting him drink. But Thor happened to be a little enthusiastic, and a little went down Loki's face. Thor apologized again and wiped it up.

"How do you feel?" He asked again when Loki had finished. Loki licked his lips, eyes fixed at the end of the bed instead of Thor's anxious face.

"My head hurts a little," Loki whispered. He felt weak. It reminded him of the times when he was a child, sick and confined to bed because he was unable to move. Thor and his friends had often teased him about not being able to sit up, or drink, or do anything at those times. He  _hated_  it.

"Anything else?" Thor asked. "Does anything else hurt?"

"My chest," Loki mumbled, looking at his lap. "My legs, too."

"Okay," Thor said, nodding. He swallowed an said "What's... What's the last thing you remember?"

 _Dark. Cold._ Alone _..._

"How did I get here?" Loki whispered, fingers curling into the fur blanket. He frowned. "Where am I?"

"We..." Thor sighed. "We are on Jotunheim."

Loki's head snapped up, and he instantly regretted it. A sharp pain flew through it and he gasped. Thor, still holding him in a sitting position, placed his other hand on his shoulder and Loki squeezed his eyes shut. "Why are we on...?" Loki wheezed, but broke off, grinding his teeth.

"It's... complicated," Thor admitted. "And a bit of a long story. But they won't harm you, I swear."

Loki breathed out a few curses and leaned back against Thor, his nose in Thor's collar. "...This isn't some dream, is it?" He whispered. "I... I died, didn't I?"

"No, brother," Thor said.  _No, Loki_. "You survived, somehow."

"Oh." Loki didn't know what to say. What  _could_  be said? His eyes burned for a moment and a lump formed in his throat, making it impossible for him to speak.

"You were gone for a year," Thor continued. "We didn't-" He stopped. “We thought you were dead. But then Heimdall saw you, so I came to get you, to bring you home."

Loki nodded, trying to keep his tears back. "And now you're leaving me here," he said, voice tight.

"What? No!" Loki winced at the sudden loud voice and Thor cringed. "Sorry, sorry. No, you're not staying here, brother. As I said, the current situation is difficult to explain."

Loki swallowed, nodding again. "You still think me your brother?" Thor was quiet. "Fath-" He shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut. "He told you, didn't he? You... know what I... What I..."

Thor put his arms around Loki. Loki's breath sharpened in surprise, but though the embrace was firm, it didn't crush him. Thor placed a kiss on his temple and said "It means  _nothing_ to me, Loki. It changes nothing. You are still my brother, still an Odinson. You are still a Prince of Asgard, and we still..." Thor sighed, voice shaky. He stroked Loki's hair again and whispered "We still  _want_ you. Loki, I beg you, come home. Come home, brother."

Loki's breath caught and he shook his head, tears beginning to roll down. He couldn't say anything for the fear of crying. Thor pressed a hand to the back of Loki's head and whispered “I owe you an apology, Loki. For everything.”

Loki shuddered and Thor continued "I swear to you, had I know, I  _never_  would have done the things that I did. I  _never_ meant to harm you, and did not even realize that I had until it was too late. I'm an idiot, a blind  _fool_. I will not ask for your forgiveness, for what I have done to you is unforgivable. I can only hope that you will allow me to try and earn it."

Loki struggled not to cry. His face was still buried in Thor's collar. Thor smelled of (I DON'T KNOW???? go back before posting/ask readers for suggestions), and of  _home_. He whined, tears beginning to leak from the corners of his eyes, even as he squeezed them shut.

"Shh," Thor whispered, stroking his hair. "Shh, it's okay. It's okay."

"I hate you," Loki choked out. He was crying, his arms still pinned to his sides. He struggled to get them free and tried to push himself away.  "I h- _hate_  you, you  _stupid_ , idiotic, inconsiderate, arrogant,  _reckless_ , self-centered, vain, brutish, rude, idiotic-"

"I think you already said that one," Thor said, and Loki finally managed to free himself from Thor's grasp.

" _Interrupting_ , loud, obnoxious, awful-" He swung his fists at Thor, but his brother caught his wrists. Loki tried to pull away again, but Thor just pulled him back, pressing Loki against his chest and wrapping his arms around him.

"Breath," Thor said, quietly, and Loki noticed his voice was tinged with sadness. When Loki continued to try to get away, he sighed and said "Loki, you are right." Loki stilled. "I am all those things and more."

Loki's fingers tightened around Thor's tunic and he shifted in Thor's embrace, taking in a shuddering breath. To his horror, it came out as a sob. Thor held on tighter and whispered "I thought you were  _gone_."

His voice cracked on the last word, and Loki pressed himself closer to his brother, letting out another sob. Thor pressed his cheek to the top of Loki's head and rocked, just holding him.

"I'm sorry," Loki said in a strangled whisper. "I'm sorry, Thor, I'm sorry."

And finally, the sons of Odin began to cry, clinging to each other as if for dear life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hey cool this is still getting comments and shit.
> 
> Also did anyone else know about FF.net's sister site, FictionPress? It's like FF.net, except for original works instead of fanfiction. I may b getting an account there for original works of mine, but eeehhhh, I kind of like AO3 better. Does AO3 even have an original works tag? I should probably go check that sometime...

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know if I'll continue??? I'm already writing chapter 2, and this is mostly just a writing exercise. It's basically another idea of "what if Loki was possessed," but a little different. Go ahead and use my parasite if you want, just name it something different and cite your sources. (Citation is important, friends.)


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